I guess some days being a "single" parent just gets to me. I am to the point today where I just don't want to go any further. I have the beginnings of a migraine and I just want to crawl into bed and cry. Husband is supposed to be home at midnight Saturday. Well I have to drive to Savannah and pick him up at midnight because the air strip here is closed due to the airshow this weekend. But anyway. . back to my point. Some days I just want to give up. I have yelled so much today. This is one of those days where the kid is being a SHIT. She is into EVERYTHING. Tearing up EVERYTHING. I have been trying to clean today. . ha ha ha. I can't get one thing finished without turning the corner and a new mess awaits. If I find one more goldfish cracker crushed into the carpet I think I may flip. I know it is not her fault, it is all of my emotions that need to be fixed. .
My life is so stressed right now. I guess I don't really have anyone to turn to. Nobody really understands how I am feeling, or they will judge me for the things that I need to get off my chest. I guess keeping all of this bottled inside is starting to take its toll on me. I don't like being that mom that screams at her kid constantly and just wants to beat her until she stops, but that is how I feel right now. I never wanted to have kids this young. But I guess that you have to take the hand that you are dealt. Here lately I have been rethinking a lot of decisions that I have made in my life. What if I would have done this differently or this. . or so on. But I can't change things now. . so I need to move on with life. Sometimes I just feel like I am missing out on something. What, I don't know. . but something.
Well I guess I need to get my head out of my ass and try and survive until bed time. Hopefully that won't be too far away.
Friday, April 20, 2007
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
